From our personal life to our relationships, our community engagement, and to our work life - we should be taking time to get clarity. Taking time to get clear on our blind spots, our feelings, and our desired outcomes leads to us showing up as our best self. We can lead ourselves and others best when we are very honest with ourselves and take steps to identify areas to work on.

Growth starts with awareness!

As we step into 2026 there are many things happening around us that we have little to no control of. Days can be long, especially at this time of year, and yet the time goes by quickly. I encourage you to take time for rest - recharge your battery and take care of yourself, take time for reflection - on where you’ve been and where you want to be, on what you carry into this year and what you leave behind. take time for resetting - get rid of what is cluttering your life, decide what you want and need - professionally, personally, intellectually, emotionally, prepare for fresh starts and finally take time to dream!

Spring will be here soon.

So, while we wait -

Dream big, dream incredibly, dream with audacity, dream SMART - but most important is simply to take the time to DREAM - about the life you want, the accomplishments you want, the legacy you want to leave behind.

2025 was heavy for so many people. I don’t know what 2026 has in store. I image more changes, more challenges, more finding myself and loving myself and others in the face of it all.

I’m taking time during these last few days of the year to look back, to acknowledge growth, acknowledge the pain, and to be grateful for all that life has given me and taken from me. I hope you are able to do the same.

Wishing us all a 2026 filled with opportunities, the ability to face and love the old and the new versions of ourselves, the ability to recognize what no longer serves us, and the courage to JUST JUMP! - without the safety net, without certainty - towards the life we are trying to build for ourselves.

We are all capable of improving in different areas - we just have to be as resilient and dedicated as those who continue in spite of struggle. Focus + consistent practice = excellence. Change your words, change your outcomes!

When we are healing ourselves - we learn a lot about ourselves. It is only through hard, uncomfortable truths with the person in the mirror that we can heal and grow. That growth does not mean that we owe everyone or even anyone an explanation or pieces of ourselves. As I’ve continued to work on these things I’ve found that my growth makes others uncomfortable and in turn, my growth makes me uncomfortable with them.

As I get older, I’ve come to realize that I actually know less than I thought I did two or more decades ago. I still hold opinions, but the number of absolutes in my life seems to shrink with each passing year. At 18, I was certain about so many things. The world appeared black and white, with only a few shades of gray in between. Right was right, wrong was wrong, and everything felt simple—before I had truly experienced the complexities of adult life.

No!

It is a complete sentence. It may be the shortest complete sentence in the English language. No…end of story. It’s that simple, although sometimes people feel they deserve, or you are required to provide justification and explanations. We also don’t need to be talked into changing our minds for someone else’s comfort or satisfaction.

The older I get the more I realize, there are few absolutes, most people are dealing with a ton of things we know little to nothing about, shame creates cycles that harm, and love and forgiveness can fill in the holes we have in our souls.

Have you ever been chugging along in life - things are going great - you feel good, you feel almost unstoppable, and things are going in your favor and then all of a sudden something happens that seems to set off a chain reaction and suddenly you feel like all your forward movement just hit a brick wall?

Yeah …Me Too!

When they are firmly committed to misunderstanding you, wasting your breath will not change their mind about you. When we engage in defending ourselves or trying to explain our reasoning to those that are committed to misunderstanding us, we suffer the consequences, and they gain more information to weaponize against us. It’s okay to be misunderstood. Instead of engaging, go through your day making the best decisions you can for the life you are living right now.

Change is always coming. We can’t outrun it. We can’t avoid it. It is coming and it will either overwhelm us, knocking us down or it will be something we rise up to meet. My challenge to all of you is to embrace change with eyes wide open. Change moves us out of our comfort zone which creates growth!

How does a survivor get past these behaviors? How do they find their power and truly have control over their lives?

In a society and world where things can feel so out of balance, and so difficult, where people can seem so unkind and uncaring, it’s important to show up with empathy. Empathy is where change begins. That change begins inside of us and then grows. In that growth we change others; sometimes through something as simple as a smile or a kind word, but that change spreads and touches others.

Intrusive Thoughts - those unsettling thoughts that come out of nowhere that have no good reason to be there. We all have them from time to time, but for some, they can be overwhelming and disturbing, interfering with your daily life in ways that feel isolating.

Mistake + Apology ≠ Forgiveness.

That is a hard pill to swallow. We all want forgiveness.

Apology + Forgiveness ≠ Access

This pill might be harder to swallow!

Each version of yourself should be a better version than the one you were before. You are a work in progress. The goal is simply to be your best today and then, new experiences and opportunities will present themselves and challenge you to grow even more. I would encourage you to to seek opportunities to improve, to take time to enjoy and celebrate your progress, and leave behind the excuse of “this is just the way I am.”

This is the heart and soul of it. We build strength when we practice and fail, and we build confidence when we practice and get it right.

Be kind to yourself. Life is hard. People may not always be kind to you - be kind to yourself and talk to yourself like you’re someone that you love!

We have all known someone who feels disrespected by others but blows through the clear and well-defined boundaries of others as if they are the Kool-Aid man pushing through the brick wall…

We understand what we know. We can normalize even the worst behaviors because as children our abusers are often trusted individuals, parents, aunts, uncles, grandparents, babysitters, teachers, preachers. police officers, etc. We are taught to love them, and often there are moments of goodness and kindness that we’ve felt before the abuse starts. It creates conflict in the child so that the child begins to blame themselves for the abuse that occurs.